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Shit.
Totally not ready for this.
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Life can be a real piece of shit, you know? D:
Yeah, but not all the time.
Actually, yeah… ALL the time.
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Dumb thing I’ve decided to let bother me today.
This is the sign on the men’s room at work. I look at this little guy every time I use the bathroom (which given my average coffee intake is a not insignificant number of times per day) and EVERY time it bothers me a little bit because the shape of his head is just slightly weird.
Normal stick figure aesthetics dictate that he should have a nice perfectly round circle head, but instead he’s carrying around this sort of oval-y Q-Tip shaped noggin and I CAN’T STOP NOTICING IT.
I’ve been working here like seven years, looking at this dumb little oval-head several times per day and it STILL bothers me.
So that’s how MY life is going. Sup with you guys?
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“…The President’s Neck is Missing…”
I miss Phil Hartman.
The WORLD misses Phil Hartman.
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It can be hard to make things work, but you do your best to figure it out.
(via mattfractionblog)
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“I no longer love her, that’s certain, but maybe I love her.
Love is so short, forgetting is so long.
Because through nights like this one I held her in my arms
my soul is not satisfied that it has lost her.
Though this be the last pain that she makes me suffer
and these the last verses that I write for her.”Pablo NerudaMy God. I can’t breathe.
Fuck.
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Sometimes I get sad about how few people use my “Ask Page”, but then I see shit like this and I get really, really, REALLY sad.
I have SO MANY opinions about batmabs thumbs… But no one ever asks.
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Texting With Purpose
A few weeks ago a friend told me it was obvious that I put a lot of time, effort, and thought into my text messages.
It was simultaneously a really nice thing to say and a damning illustration of how stupid my life is and the dumb directions in which I choose to focus my energy.
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My ten custom Superfight cards are powers/problems.
- covered in honey
- riding a bear
- made of marshmallows
- constantly thinking about pie
- made of boners
- has a superintelligent tapeworm
- terrified of kittens
- still bitter about the last episode of LOST
- can’t stop twerking
- must consult a magic 8 ball before each attack
I feel pretty good about them.I can’t wait to come over and be drunk when I Superfight my Zombie who is 100 Stories Tall and Can’t Stop Twerking against your George W. Bush who is Covered in Honey and Riding a Bear.
Jesus Christ I cannot wait for this fucking game…
(100 story tall twerking zombie takes this fight in a walk. It’s not explicitly mentioned, but you just KNOW Bush is probably drunk and he’ll fall off the bear and get eaten as a delicious honey covered snack before he even gets to the venue.)
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It’s true. I’m pretty great.
And I care about baseball uniforms more than I probably should…
Ladies?
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A man’s got to live by a code…
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Current status…
